In this video, Brian discusses what confidence really looks like and three steps to build confidence in all areas of your life.
Editor’s Note: This post was originally published in May 2016. The post has been edited while the video is in its originally published form.
Be it a job interview, a hot date, a big presentation or speech, or any other area in life where confidence is important, people love to say things like “just be confident,” and “just be yourself.”
Being confident *is* the key to “being yourself”…and vice versa…and those are the biggest keys to being the best, most attractive, most successful, happiest person you can be…but what does any of that really mean? What does confidence really look like, and how can you become more confident if you weren’t “born with it”? How exactly do you “just be confident” or “just be yourself”?
No, it’s not a case of “either you have it or you don’t” – that’s a terrible piece of societal limiting belief bull. Confidence is a muscle that can be developed by anyone – our clients do it very successfully all the time – and FEARLESS founder Brian Begin breaks down 3 key steps to build confidence from wherever you’re at right now. Whether it’s confidence with women, with people in general, with job interviews or asking for a raise, or any area of your life…it all boils down to the same core principles and beliefs.
Summarizing the 3 Steps to Build Confidence
1-Don’t FORCE confidence – relax into it.
When it comes to connecting with people, pumping yourself up to “be confident” actually makes it hard to form emotional connections because you’re all pumped up and racing or hyper. You want to relax into being confident and relax into connecting with people.
2-Learn to be proactive with tension.
Try to slow down how you handle and react to tension. When facing uncomfortable situations and little moments of pressure, don’t rush through it to get back into your comfort zone. That’s reactive. Try to learn to enjoy being uncomfortable, even if it’s just 1% at first.
3-Be Vulnerable
Don’t confuse vulnerability with neediness. Neediness is asking people to fix you, make you feel better, be your happiness or self-esteem, etc. Vulnerability is being willing to share emotions and emotional experiences with people from a place of “this is me and I can handle it.” Being vulnerable is extremely powerful for forming and strengthening connections with people, and it’s actually a very confident thing to do.
And really, it’s not truly even about “learning” to be confident. Your body already knows how to balance before you ever get on a bike – you just have to get in touch with that balance and feel it out. And similarly, confidence is already inside you – it’s actually your natural state underneath all your insecurities, defense mechanisms, and limiting beliefs/stories. You just have to start to strip away all that stuff that isn’t you to get to the naturally confident you – the real you.
Enjoy the video, and find the follow-up video here: How to Build Powerful Confidence – More on How to Be Confident
Related:
Meet & Attract Women the Most Natural Way: Trust your Gut – Ruwan Meepagala | Becoming FEARLESS -Ep9
How to Meet & Attract Great Women – Stop Pushing them Away | Inside FEARLESS
Questions? Tweet @BrianFearless
