Two important pieces of being confident and good with women are vulnerability, and accepting and loving yourself, which itself comes partially through vulnerability.
Editor’s Note: This post was originally published in August 2016.
Vulnerability is actually one of your most attractive qualities as a man. In a lot of ways, it’s the truest, most powerful form of confidence, because it takes confidence to open up to women (or anyone) and be raw and vulnerable.
So why is a man being vulnerable often confused with weakness? It’s because vulnerability is often attempted by men from a needy place – a mindset and vibe of “please like me” or generally trying to get something out of being “vulnerable.” But that’s not really being vulnerable – that’s being insecure and/or manipulative.
When you come from a place of owning your vulnerability, it becomes powerfully attractive and magnetic to women and most anyone. It’s about not making her responsible for making you feel better – coming from a place of “Yeah, I’m scared. I’m nervous. But I’m a man and I can handle it.”
Real vulnerability is magnetic to everyone. Think about a time you’ve seen a powerful, well-respected man open up about something personal and emotional. It draws you in because it’s so real and raw.
You don’t have to, as Brian says in the video, “jump the grand canyon” of vulnerability. Just a little bit can go a long way with connecting with women and making her feel like she knows the real you. What scares you? What excites you? What are your dreams? What are some vulnerable stories or experiences from your past? Brian gives a great example from his own life in the video.
And as Brian also talks about in the video, don’t use this to get a reaction out of people, and definitely don’t take other people’s stories and recite them as your own, as some “pickup artists” (“PUAs”) do. There’s no need! Just learn and practice a little of this real vulnerability – the real, slightly vulnerable you is what women want.
Related Videos:
Being Confident, Vulnerable, & Authentic in Daily Life – Allana Pratt | Becoming FEARLESS
Sexual Tension and Confident vs Needy Men | Inside FEARLESS #1
Getting the First Kiss: Building and Dancing with Sexual Tension
5 Ways to tell if a Girl Likes You – Signs Women are Attracted to You
What Women Want – Women Crave Sexual Tension | Inside FEARLESS #11
