Trying not to be awkward or to avoid awkward moments when talking to girls isn’t the answer. It’s often going to be awkward when you first approach and start talking to a woman, so let’s learn to deal with it.
It’s not about avoiding being awkward or making women feel awkward – it’s about becoming ok with awkwardness. Getting comfortable being uncomfortable.
This week’s question comes from Cameron:
Hi Brian, I love following your work. It’s really made a huge difference in my life, as I’ve come to realize that my major block I have with women is the “self rejecting” things that I do subconsciously that pushes women away.
I’m able to attract women initially, but when I get the courage to approach them, I end up sabotaging it, and I can see the girls get weirded out by my sub communication, and sometimes I can see that they are actually really annoyed by my “persona” that comes up when i’m nervous talking to a beautiful girl.
How can I become more aware of what i’m doing that is rejecting women? Inside myself I feel fear, sometimes insecurity, and then usually when I see the woman responding poorly I get frustrated, and then I get depressed that once again I ruined an opportunity.
I haven’t been on a date in months, and I haven’t had any physical contact with women for a year or more. My confidence is really starting to plummet because I’ve been trying to fix this issue for years, and that’s not an exaggeration. sometimes I feel like I’ll never be able to even get a date or kiss because of my self sabotage.
Can you give me an exercise or maybe just some words of advice on how to push past this stage I’m at?
Thanks
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