When it comes to finding and attracting great women, many men these days are going down “Red Pill” holes and being victims, blaming “how awful women are” for their problems…and missing all the great women out there who LOVE men because the man’s filter is set to find evidence to prove him right. In this video, Brian discusses some of the most common complaints we hear men say about women and why that’s not helping them find awesome women to date.
Editor’s Note: This post was originally published in September 2016. The video remains in its originally-published form while the post has been updated.
FEARLESS founder Brian Begin addresses two of the most common complaints men make about women on our videos:
-That women are bitches
-That men have to work on themselves to get a better dating, relationships, and sex life but women don’t need to better themselves in their dating lives
As Brian explains in the video, our brains can only consciously process a tiny fraction of all the millions of bits of raw information coming at us constantly. So if you believe “women are bitches,” your mind will sort for information (out of all the info coming at you) that supports that belief, while someone who believes that women are loving, kind, and love men will find evidence to support that belief.
It’s confirmation bias. If we told you to stand on a sidewalk at a busy intersection and count up all the black cars going by for 3 minutes…but then, at the end, we suddenly asked you how many blue cars went by, you probably would have no recollection, because that’s not what you were looking for. We have a tendency to find information to support our (conscious and subconscious) beliefs. Just think about heavily debated political issues and how people on multiple sides of an argument are deadset in their position that the evidence they’ve found proves that they’re more “correct” than others who disagree.
So if you think women are bitches, know that there are many, many men who have a completely different reality from you and have great interactions and relationships with women, and try to start consciously looking for evidence that women are awesome, caring, friendly, good-hearted, love men, and love sex.
In terms of who has to work harder to have a good dating, sex, and love life, that’s just victim mentality.
First of all, you’re not seeing all the time, energy, and money that women put into looking amazing. All the expensive makeup, hair and skin products, shoes and clothing…the list goes on. They’re almost certainly spending quite a bit more money than you in every one of those areas…and then there’s all the time to use those things! Doing their hair, shaving their legs, trying on different outfits.
You’re also not seeing all the things they have to worry about more than you – their personal safety going through the world as a woman, men who aren’t honest with them about what they want or how they see her (ie players, cheaters, other liars) and often break their hearts, “nice guys” who aren’t being real with her and are manipulating her and telling her everything they think she wants to hear to get in her pants, etc.
But beyond that, worrying about things being all fair and equal and the same for everyone is again, plain victim mentality, which is a lot of what Brian talks about in the video – really do your best to take in and try on everything he says. When you do, it empowers you.
Related Videos:
How to Meet & Attract Great Women – Stop Pushing them Away | Inside FEARLESS #18
Why Women Suck (Why the women YOU Meet Suck)
How to be Good with Women – Loving Yourself Isn’t Lip Service | Inside FEARLESS #42
