Victim mentality is when you don’t take complete responsibility for your life and where you’re at, and you blame other people, the world, society, perceived limitations, or the past for part or all of your shortcomings. That, along with your relationship to failure is what you need to do to stop holding yourself back.
Victim mentality (also known as victim consciousness) is rampant in our culture. Taking FULL responsibility for your own life and learning to love failure is a big key to massive success and growth.
When you place blame or responsibility for dealing with anything in your life on anyone but yourself, you’re robbing yourself of your power. Even if someone did do something terrible to you, it’s your responsibility to handle it and move forward, bottom line. The more you can look internally and even ask yourself how you played a part in creating the situation, the more empowered you become and quicker you can stop holding yourself back from anything and everything you want in life.
One example is a quarterback of a football team whose offense played terribly and they lost a big game despite him playing very well personally. If he just throws up his arms and thinks “Well, I did my job. It’s their fault we lost. Oh well!” he can’t really learn anything or get better from the experience. But if he takes full responsibility for the loss as the leader of the offense. he’s likely to realize things he can do better for his team in the future: Motivate his teammates better, make better adjustments against the defense, throw the ball to slightly different spots…and tons of little things he may have missed if he just goes with the kneejerk reaction that everyone else did a bad job.
Another thing you need to change to stop holding yourself back is your relationship to failure and beating yourself up. This one is also really important, and Brian discusses it a lot in the video. Watch that, and then read this post: 3 Steps to Stop Being So Hard on Yourself
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