In this video, Brian talks about why women like bad boys, and how you can get that “bad boy” edge without becoming an asshole.
The biggest why women like bad boys more than your typical people-pleasing “nice guy” os that bad boys are actually being more real than nice guys. Bad boys are closer to “just being themselves” than nice guys, and they’re more honest with women than nice guys.
Nice guys – guys who look at bad boy types, think they’re assholes, and can’t understand why women “never like nice guys” isn’t actually being generous when he’s “nice” to women. He’s doing it to get her to like him. That’s not nice or generous at all – that’s a covert contract, giving to get, and it’s manipulative. A lot of nice guys aren’t aware they’re doing this – they think they’re being nice. But manipulative and inauthentic is what it ultimately is.
And this trying so hard to get women to like them leaves them devoid of much personality. Because they’re always trying so hard to figure out how to be or what to do to make women happy, make them like them, get them into bed, avoid conflict, etc. That’s not being yourself. It’s hiding and ultimately lying to women. And again, there’s just no personality there for the woman to vibe off of and bond with. Boring!
The bad boy may often be a heartbreaker. He’s not always going to tell the woman what she wants to hear or do what she wants him to do. But THAT makes him authentic. That makes him real. He’s (at least moreso than the nice guy) actually being himself and he’s got a real personality for her to flirt with, connect with, and get turned on by.
He’s not afraid of her. He’s willing to be blunt with her, to confront her about things he doesn’t like, to create and play with tension with her – you need tension to create sexual tension, aka sexual chemistry.
But you don’t need to try to be a “bad boy” for women to adore you. You just need to be real – with women, and more importantly, with yourself.
Enjoy the video!
