What’s your story (aka limiting belief) about why women – or maybe the women you want – don’t like you?
I talk about this in lots of videos (and social media comments ALL THE TIME) because men’s stories about “Women don’t like ___,” or “Women only like men who ____” are so pervasive.
Holding on to those beliefs is really keeping your life small, so I want to tell you some stories that I hope will open your eyes to your power as a man.
I have clients who are physically disabled, short and chubby, bald, old, shy, and on and on who have all learned to be good or great with women. I have clients who have been great with women even in the midst of financial struggles.
Disabled…but not with Women
One of those physically disabled clients, Mike, now works for us. He’s written a number of blog posts on his journey from needy nice guy to a man who’s developing into a lady killer. His stories on the blog are just what he’s been willing to share publicly (he’s pulled off some really crazy things, especially lately) but here are some of his stories:
Is Personal Development a Scam? A Disabled Person’s Story
One of my proudest moments as a man (so far)
This is How Simple and Quick Connecting with Women Can Be
Another disabled client, Aubin, has cerebral palsy and makes Mike look like a pro athlete when it comes to how they move physically, but (along with ditching his walker and learning to walk, ditching his corporate job, and moving to Thailand all on his own to pursue his entrepreneur life) he has also had his own amazing experiences with women since working with us. There are others, too.
Speaking of disabilities, Sean Stehenson is 2-feet tall and in a wheelchair, and women everywhere loved him when he learned to own his disability…before he found “the one.”
Nick Vujicic is yet another example.
No Money…but Rich with Women
When I was younger and totally hopeless with women, I had a roommate who was fresh out of jail, no job, no money…and he brought women home night after night. I resented him for it at first when I met him in the Yoga commune we were living in because I felt like I had my life together more than him and that I was a better guy girls should like…but even in the hippie environment, all the women gravitated to him and only saw me as a friend.
Deciding to get over my ego and resentment and live with him to study why women liked him was an important step in my development as a man.
Not one, but TWO other men I know lived in vans for a while and had a blast bringing girls back to their vans. Because they owned it. They weren’t ashamed of it, and their confidence, charisma, and authenticity shone through.
A young guy named Anthony came to me after growing up, sort of like me, with constant financial struggles and a ton of shyness. Even while he continued to scrape by financially, living at home with his mom, and still having a shy energy, he started killing it with women. Anthony’s now one of my coaches. You can get to know him a little in the video below.
Short and Chubby, but that’s not what Women See
I have a very short, chubby client who came to us very frustrated by women…and his height. He learned to really open up with people, own his height, and totally kill it with women. Especially ones much taller than him.
He once even was hanging out with a prince and a boxing champ in LA, and after they saw how good he was socially, they asked HIM if he could talk to some girls they liked for them! He brought the girls back to their table, but despite his best efforts to set up the boxer and the prince, the girls kept turning their attention to my client.
He’s now married to a beautiful Eastern European woman who’s a lot taller than him.
Shredded and Handsome…but Lonely
On the other hand, I also have a lot of really good-looking clients who have come to me because they had no women in their lives. One of them even models. He looks the part of a GQ or fitness magazine cover model, but he came to me because in spite of that, he was still struggling with women. He didn’t know how to connect with them and he still felt insecure deep down in spite of his looks and muscles.
Joe is another example. He was shredded but his anxiety and self-consciousness made it next to impossible for him to connect with women. My interview with him below is a long one, but it’s cued up below to him talking about his failed “bodybuilding for women” strategy.
The same is true for money – I’ve had many finacially successful men who came to me with their lives mostly together, but their beliefs were keeping women away.
These are just a few examples that come to mind. Whatever your story is about why the women you like don’t like you, I can almost guarentee I’ve helped guys with the same issue or one that seems much more challenging.
It’s not your looks, money, status, or anything else external – it’s who you’re being, your beliefs about yourself as a man, your beliefs about women, and your connection skills.
Looks can help a little, sure, but they’re far from the determining factor.
Are there gold diggers out there? Of course. But they’re the exception to the rule.
The great news here is that everything that it takes to have a great dating, sex, and love life is in your control. And it’s already all inside of you. As a man, you are made to attract women.
The bad news is that to start to get there, you’re going to have to give up your victim stories. And those stories have served you in one way or another. They’ve minimized your pain (at least to some degree) around not having the women you want in your life. When you can point the finger at others – for example, at women for “sucking” or at other external things you don’t have that are supposedly requirements for being attractive to women – you don’t have to look at yourself in the mirror and take responsibility for how you are pushing women away.
Don’t confuse what I’m saying. I’m not telling you to blame yourself. Much of this reality you have now, you created subconsciously…and yes, society, the media, even your parents, friends, and others who meant well may have given you bad programming, too.
But it is your responsibility to shift that.
And it’s all within your power as a man when you face yourself and start working on it.
Obviously, I hope you’ll consider coming to an event – The FEARLESS Man Live is jam-packed with value for a low cost – but if not, all the free content my team and I put out can change your life if you work on it and stick with it consistently.
It doesn’t need to be hours every day you work on this stuff. Pick one small practice at a time that you can focus on and be consistent with, like the confidence aka tension journal I always talk about.
But realize your stories are bs, realize they’re keeping you in avoidance of the truth and away from what you want…and do something.
Check out our live events here.
Related:
The Art of Confidence | Use This Simple Tool To Build Your Confidence
How to Meet & Attract Great Women – Stop Pushing them Away | Inside FEARLESS #18
